Welcome to The Deal Pen, a podcast that digs into the details of untold stories from crafty real estate investors. And now here's your host Avi Rosowski.

Okay. We are live in The Deal Pen with Brad Chandler. Brad, how are you doing today?

Avi Rasowsky

I'm awesome. Thanks for having me.

Brad Chandler

I'm very excited to talk with you today. Brad is from a company many, many investors have known about for a long time called Express Home Buyers. And then we're going to dive into not just real estate today, but also happiness and love and other important things that people don't think are important until they realize they are, right? So that company is called Limitless You, is that correct?

Avi Rasowsky

That's right. Yep. UnlockLimitlessYou.com is the website.

Okay, amazing. UnlockLimitlessU.com. Very excited to chat with you today. You sent me a message a few days ago and I was like, I had to pinch myself because I've looked up to you for so many years in the industry. So thank you for being open to do this. And I would love to dive in to kind of hear about your story and how it's evolved over the years. Is there any particular place you want to start?

No, I mean, I usually go back to ninth grade, actually. It all started back in ninth grade. I started before that. And we'll get into that, what I mean, in a few minutes as we unpack my life. But ninth grade, I read a book on how to buy real estate by a guy named Robert Allen that 30 years later, I got to meet at a mastermind I'm in last year. And it was how to buy real estate with no money down. And I knew at the time, I wanted to do real estate because it had unlimited income potential. And I wanted to make a lot of money, but I didn't know why. I just knew I wanted to make a lot of money. And we'll get to that as the show goes on. So I bought my first house in 2003. An investor actually bought my neighbor's house. I went and talked to him because it was like this rundown house. And all of a sudden, like two months later, it was really cleared out and pretty. And I went and talked to him. He goes, yeah, I buy real estate at 30% below market. I fix it up and I resell it. And I was like, the book I remember didn't talk about that. It talked more about holding residents for real estate, you know, put down the 80 or get a loan for 80%, put it down to 20% and then wait. But I didn't know you could do that. So I'm like, I'm going to do that. So I spent seven long months between November of 2002, in July of 2003 where I bought my first house. I bought six houses in July and August of 2003. October, I went to my boss. I quit. I came home. I told my wife, I just quit. I'm starting Express Home Buyers. She's like, are you crazy? We have a newborn son and I have two kids that you're supporting. What are you thinking? And I was like, it's going to be, it's going to be fine. And here we are 20 something, 21, 22 years later, we flip flee fix and flipped and wholesale 4,500 houses. And I was right. Everything was fine. We're not still married, but it's better than fine. It's freaking amazing.

Wow. So that was over three and you, so then you bought your house that you lived in six months after you started basically.

No, I bought my, so I moved in in Vienna in 2002. That was the first house I ever bought on my own. And then later that year is when the investor bought my neighbor's house. And so I decided in November, 2002, I'm going to do this business. And I was working full time. I would come home. My son was just born. He was born in July of 2002. So I'd spend six to 8 p.m. with him. I'd put him to bed and then I'd go pounding. We buy houses, signs, hand addressing, hundreds of envelopes. And each week that went by without a deal, and I showed up to these RIA meetings, the Real Estate Investment Association meetings, and these people were doing deals. And I'm just like, what the heck? If they can do them, I can do them. So I just got more and more persistent. And then all of my work came together in July and August. It just all came together, six houses in two months. And I had like 60 grand in the bank or something, I think. I had like $80,000 of debt from student loans, but I had $60,000 and I think I felt rich. So I was like, I'm going to quit and do this full time. And it probably was a little bit, I don't know, I don't want to say reckless. It was a little bit risky. We'll use that word. But I was determined and here we are, it paid off.

There you go. So we, I mean, very rarely will people meet someone that's done a hundred deals, let alone 4,500 deals. If you can first, because I want to get into that, but if you can back into people that may listen to this and say, okay, that's a universe away from where I am right now. How did you get it done from going to Rio meetings to actually figuring out how to get your first and first few deals if you could remember the fundamentals?

Yeah. I mean, I can remember my first deals like they were yesterday. The first one ever was a realtor brought it to me. It was a VA deal. And I'm pretty convinced to this day that he made more money than I did because he's like, I'm going to bring you the house. I'm going to the buyer's commission and you've got to relist with me on the back end, which now, if anyone told me that I'd be like, unless it was a killer deal, I'd be like, no. So I probably made like 10 grand on that, but I learned, like, I just learned the second deal was a, um, was a house that I had kept in touch with the lady's realtor. I'd offered her back in March of 2003 and she went into foreclosure and they called me in June or July and said, hey, I know you're a foreclosure expert. My client is five days away from foreclosure and she has five kids and they're gonna be put out. So I put that deal together with actually the guy helped me who bought my neighbor's house. I kept in touch with him. So what's the theme here? Keeping in touch with people. I found her, for the young folk, they don't even know what this is, on a listserv. It was a Yahoo listserv. I found this lady back in March, and I was the only person that kept in touch with her real estate agent. So I bought that as my second house, and then, this is a great story, I'm getting ready to rehab, but I know nothing about rehabbing, and I hear a Ron LeGrand tape, and Ron LeGrand says, before you list, put an ad in the paper that says Handyman Special. So I did it. I had an open house. There was so much trash, Avi. There was dumpsters and dumpsters full of trash, but without the dumpsters just piled in the front yard. And this is 2003. The real estate market was just heating up, right? So I thought I'd be inundated with people. One lady showed up and she freaking bought the house and I made $43,000. The funny thing is I stuck a We Buy Houses sign in the front yard and I got a call one night on Friday and it was a truck driver and she was asking about buying the house. And I go, it's already sold. But I took something that Robert Sheiman, another kind of OG in this business taught me. He said, every person you speak with, ask them, do they know anyone that has a house that they want to buy or sell? So I asked that lady this, and she goes, oh, my mom has a house in Arlington she wants to sell. And I go, how much? She goes, well, I think she wants like $230 for it. And I'm like, Arlington? $230? That sounds pretty good. So she goes, let me call her. She calls her back. She goes, I got her down to $185. I got her down. I bought the house for 85. I did the renovation. Of course, I messed up on the ARV. It was lower than I thought. I messed up on the renovation budget. It was higher than I thought. I walked away with a check. I think I made $60,000 on that deal. And I think that's what I was making a couple months later, working an entire job for the entire year.

What were you doing before real estate?

I was working for this developer who bought rundown apartments and turned them into condos and had some section eight housing too.

Interesting. Okay. So Robert Sheiman, I don't think I've heard that name. So he had, how would I find information on him?

So Robert Schuman and Ron Legrand, I mean, they go back decades. They're some of the OGs in terms of like residential investment. I mean, just Google Robert. Schemin, actually, I've mispronounced his name all these years. I think it's actually Schemin, S-H-E-M-I-N. Super, super nice guy. I mean, so nice that I met the guy one time. I told him that my best friend was having a bachelor party. It's funny, the same guy's having a bachelor party that's getting remarried in Poland. I told you I was there. So I'm like, yeah, we're going to Miami. And you know, he says, he goes, you want my penthouse? And I'm like, are you kidding? He's like, no. And so me and 10 of my friends show up at South Beach, the last one on South Beach, and he gave us his penthouse for a weekend. It was like, what a freaking great guy. Till this day, I don't keep in touch with him a lot, but I could pick up the phone right now and be like, what's up, Robert? And he'd be like, yo, Brad.

That's cool. Okay. I'll have to look, yeah, I'll have to look him up. I obviously, I know of Ron Legrand, but so the one question from Robert Shemin, made you 60K on that one deal. And I'm sure more on many other deals. Yes.

Yeah. Because the deal in Arlington, I put a WeBuy house to sign there too. And this guy calls me one day and he's like, Hey, do you want to go to lunch? And at the time I was looking for a partner for two reasons. One is I wanted, I had no money. And I wanted to start a TV campaign because that's what my dad did as an attorney. He started advertising really before any other attorneys did. So I wanted money, I needed money, and I needed quality of life. So this guy calls me and we went and had one of the best chicken cheese sticks I've ever had at this Latino rotisserie place. And over lunch, we crafted a business plan. I basically told him my vision. I want to do TV advertising. I want to make this a nationwide company. He's like, I want in. I've got $10,000. I'll give you a check right now. Until this day, this guy is my partner, Judd Allen, and I consider him a great friend. And we've had this amazing partnership through the years.

Wow. Okay. And so was that, that was Express Homebuyers?

So he lived, yeah, that's Express Homebuyers. So he, he lived in Arlington and he couldn't believe that we, that I could buy a house like that in Arlington because he thought you only did it in the, like the really low income areas.

Right. Right. Well, yeah, that's a, okay. So, At some point, you got from where a lot of us are now, which is just like an individual doing deals, solopreneur type to, I don't know if you thought about it or planned it or what, but you turned into a very large Pretty much nationwide company, right?

Yeah. I mean, I don't know if I give us the nationwide label quite yet. We do some stuff in L.A. We've got a guy in L.A. We are in Baltimore. We're in D.C. We have certainly done deals nationwide. So I guess we're a nationwide company. It was always my plan. And what I did is one of the first books I ever read was the E-Myth. by Michael Gerber. And it's all about the 32nd version is a barber becomes a barber, opens their own shop because they're good at cutting hair, but they know nothing about the business or running a business. And all they do is they get themselves a job where they've got to work more and sometimes get paid less. So the whole book is about setting up systems for your business, just almost like a McDonald's. Whether you want to open two stores or a thousand, you set them up like you're going to open a thousand stores. So My advice to you is, as you're starting your business, start to document, even if it's literally writing on a Google Doc, just the steps of the process. Because at some point in time, you're going to want to take yourself out of those $10 an hour tasks, put someone else in, and then you're going to have something to give to them. And that's really all I did. I'm not a systems guy. I'm a visionary. But I fought through it. And we hired a consultant, actually, from the E-Myth organization. And we just started systematizing the business. Now, here we are 20 years later, 21 years later, and I work sometimes an hour a week, sometimes a half hour a week, sometimes I'll go three weeks without having any contact with the office at all. So I've gotten to the point, Judd is still involved in the business, so he does an amazing job. He helps run it with a CFO and an operations person, and we just have an amazing team. I mean, it's, yeah, really blessed to have an amazing team.

Well, that's awesome. I remember, I think it was four or five years ago, I watched an interview with you talking about using virtual assistants in other countries. I think it was the Philippines at the time. But I actually dabbled in that a little bit because of your advice. Was that a big part of what you did and still do with that company? on how you get things done?

So I don't know if I would say that was a big part of our success. We, yeah, we still have, I think, 12 virtual assistants in my coaching business, which we'll talk about here in a second. I've actually hired two people from Egypt and oh my gosh, one is a new hire, so the jury's still out. But the one that we've had for like a month now, oh my gosh, like amazing, like amazing, amazing.

So yeah, I want to get into that, expand on that, but can you get into how you basically, I know there's a ton of detail, but how you built Express Home Buyers from where it began to kind of where it is today?

Yeah. I mean, it really is a lot simpler than people might think. So it's Judd and I, we're doing everything. And I come into the office one day, I'm like, wait, this doesn't make sense. Let's separate these duties. I'm going to focus on taking all the calls and going out and meeting with the sellers. You figure out the financing and the construction. And so the interesting part was for like 20 years, that's what we did. He kind of ran finance and he was like the de facto CFO and dealt with all the investors and the construction people. And I was on the marketing and sales side. So we split and then we're like, okay, well, I can't keep doing acquisitions. So then what do we do? We hire a guy and I trained him and I wrote the systems and the procedure. I think the first person actually was an admin. And Gary Keller always says, the first person you should hire is like an administrative assistant because you are worth hundreds of dollars an hour. No matter what you're making right now, you're worth hundreds of dollars an hour. So stop doing 10, 15, or now $4 or $5 an hour tasks that a virtual assistant can do. And that's it. That's how simple business is. So you got the people in the processes. Part of the people in the process is you got to get the phone ringing. Are you going to do texting? Are you going to do calling? Are you going to do direct mail? Like there's a million ways the lead comes in. You got to be really, really good. We fell down. We used to think we were really good. Now I think we are really good after many, many years. you're going to be incredible when that lead comes in because it costs you a lot of money, a lot more than it did a year ago, to make sure that you're all over that lead. So as a new investor, one of the best things you can do is never give up on a lead. We've closed leads from seven years prior. So until they tell you, no way I'm ever selling, take me off your list, or you figure out that it's sold, keep calling them, keep texting them, keep sending them postcards, keep emailing them, whatever it is, keep touching them.

I mean, yeah, absolutely. I and look, I'm guilty of it many times over where I'd work a lead and it wouldn't turn out and I just throw it away. And you're right. I mean, stick to it. And I haven't had anything from seven years ago, but I've definitely had people come back many, many months later, if not a couple of years later. And yeah, everybody else gave up on him, right? And they still have something that they need to, they need some help with. So, okay. So you, you built up Express Home Buyers and you've got to a point where essentially you had a team running the operation for you and Judd, right?

Yeah. I mean, Judd is still, well, he's, I wouldn't say heavily involved, but he's more involved than I am for sure.

And today, the business today is a home buyer in multiple locations, right? Yep. Any particular exit or do you guys do anything that the property needs, whether it needs renovation or you just wholesale it out or what will you do with properties?

We do everything. We wholesale them. We do minimum renovations. Sometimes we take it down and list it. I mean, I think we've got a renovation going on now that's probably going to be $150,000. We don't love those. We typically like to get in and get out fast. I think our average has probably been $30,000 or $40,000 if you look at the last 2,000 renovations we've done. Okay.

One thing before we jump over into Limitless U and your coaching and what kind of more of what you're focused on now, and whatever you're comfortable sharing on this, because I just remember bits and pieces of the story. A friend of mine told me about, I think it was a lawsuit that you were sort of fighting against the term we buy houses. Is that correct? It is. Marketing. Do you mind sharing some of that or whatever you can?

No. Years ago, The owner of WeBuyHouses.com, Jeremy Grant, took down some YouTube videos of ours, and he claimed that it was a trademark infringement, which he somehow got the trademark, We Buy Houses, I have no idea. So we started this fight and I got a lot of investors involved. And frankly, I mistakenly assumed that a lot of investors would come to my defense and give money. I think we raised like $100,000 total and the bill that Judd and I got stuck with was closer to $2 million. But ultimately, we prevailed. Yeah, ultimately we prevailed if you call it that. It's kind of like kissing your sister because we got the WeBuyHouses trademark canceled. So no more letters threatening action if you use WeBuyHouses. So it was good for the investment community. I don't know that it did a whole lot for us, but drain our bank accounts.

Oh my gosh. Okay. No, I did not know that. I haven't read the court cases or anything. So people can know that's totally separate from WeBuyUglyHouses and HomeVestors, right? Totally different. Yeah. It's a different company. Okay. Well, thank you on behalf of all investors. I'm sorry that you didn't get more support on that end. What year was that roughly?

It started in 2017. I think it lasted for like two years.

Oh my gosh. Okay. All right, well, maybe we can skip to a more positive note then. I will tell you this. I don't know anybody else in my network that sends me a voice note on my birthday of you singing happy birthday out loud in a messenger note. And I don't know how many people you do that to, but it's unbelievable. I'm like, man, he is really committed to just making someone's day. So thank you for doing that face to face here. And what, tell me a little bit about, you kind of referenced a, a change in perspective in your life. Maybe you can kind of talk about what happened with you.

Yeah, it was 2021, early 2021, or even late 2020. And I was trying to get my son help for anxiety. And I was on a zoom call with a performance coach. Uh, and she said to me, you've got a tick. And I was like, what are you talking about? It was in the first like five minutes. And she goes, you blink like crazy. When you talk about your childhood, you may have some unresolved childhood trauma, that's affecting your son's anxiety. And I'm like, no way. I'm a great dad. I've been a single dad for years. I do everything with that kid. I get up in the morning, cooking breakfast. I'm home every night for dinner. We travel around the country playing in sporting events or golf, really. He competed at the Masters in the first ever drive-shipping putt and came in second place. Wow. So I'm like, no way. But she's like, I think there might be that chance. Do you want to come out and work with my ex Navy SEAL husband and me for a weekend in Park City? And I said, sure, I'll try anything. And in that weekend, Avi, it was a three hour session in an Airbnb bedroom, laying down on this bed. My life forever changed. I came back from that and my life had changed so profoundly. I looked around at all of my networks, everyone that I knew from business to family to friends to country club, marina, whatever it is. I was like, oh my gosh, I know so many people who are suffering, struggling with addiction, depression, anxiety, overweight, drinking too much, working too much. I was like, their problem was my problem. And I just solved this in three hours. Oh my gosh, there's something here. I just started feeling as the week went by that I've got to share my story. So I started telling people and people started opening up to me. And I can't tell you in that first six months, how many people were like, I've never told anyone that before, or you're the second person in my life I've ever shared that with. You make me feel so comfortable, and I'm even getting more out of you than my therapist. So I started doing more and more of that. I started coaching, and it's turned into a full-fledged business where that's all I do now. Myself and my partner, my life partner and business partner, Yvonne, and I help people break down these limiting subconscious beliefs that I didn't know I even had, and most people don't even know they have, that are creating the negative behavior. That's what we're doing. We're helping people change their lives. And I can get more into detail on some mind-blowing things on why we all have negative behaviors and why we can't stop them.

Yeah, I mean, I'm edging my seat now. I would love for you to share more detail, but what, so are you focused on people that are sort of like, you know, what you've grown up as, which is a business owner in the real estate investing space or anybody that you can help that just has issues that you can remove those limiting beliefs?

So because of my entrepreneurial background, I have attracted a lot of entrepreneurs. We have a podcast. We just finished episode, I think 103, and it's ranked in the top 2% of all podcasts worldwide. It's called how to be happier for entrepreneurs. So as smart marketers, I've targeted entrepreneurs, but does that mean I have taken on, you know, that's all we deal with? No, look, we can help anyone with pretty much anything that comes to any negative problem or any problem you have in your life is a thinking problem. This is going to be maybe the most important part of the show, even more important than the real estate stuff, because I can tell you that I lost $9 million making five business mistakes because of the way I thought. I know that there's a lot of new investors out there that are struggling, and it has nothing to do with their intelligence, it has to do with what I'm about to tell you. Here's the secret to life. The secret to life is, every negative behavior that you have in your life, is your brain's perceived solution at something that's even worse. So the negative thing that you have tried so hard to stop doing, whether it's drinking, eating, being depressed, anxious, shutting down when your spouse says something to you. is driven by what your brain thinks is something even more painful and worse. And by the brain, specifically the subconscious brain. And the subconscious brain drives 95% of your behavior on a daily basis. So if you want to know why traditional talk therapy doesn't work so often, it's because they focus on the symptoms in the conscious mind. So the subconscious mind's role in your mind and body and brain is to keep you alive, that's it. So it wants to move you from pain to pleasure. Well, this negative thing, again, this behavior that you can't stop, your brain thinks it's actually a solution, something better than this thing over here. But when we do the work that we do at Limitless You, what we do is we show your brain that the thing that you're running from is nothing more than an untruth. And so we show you through imagination or through actual experiences, your life, well, this, what you think is not true. And then your brain goes ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. It's called a mismatch detector. Literally it's for our survival. It's like, wait, I had this one emotional learning, but now I'm bringing, I'm learning something completely different. What happens is the neural pathway. through this technique called memory reconsolidation, becomes labile when you get it in the state of the, let's say the anxiety is your problem. So you feel that anxiety, that neural pathway becomes labile, which means changeable. You show your brain the opposite, which is the truth, and guess what happens? You literally replace that neural pathway. The old one is gone. So what do you think happens to the negative behavior? It vanishes, it vanishes immediately, and it vanishes forever. This stuff is only taught and used by, I would say, a fraction of 1% of the life coaches, the psychologists, the therapists, the psychiatrists, because guess what? They didn't know about it until the last 20 years. They proved it through science. They thought, and let me give you a real life example. Mom, at five years old, Mom won't give me a cookie, so I say I hate you. She cries for two hours and then dad comes home and says, don't you ever make mom feel that way and spanks me. So what is this emotional learning that's emblazoned in my brain? It's if I am my authentic self and show my true feelings, love will be taken from me. If love is taken from me by a caregiver, I might get kicked out of the tribe. What happens when you get kicked out of the tribe? You die. You die. So what they figured out in the last 20 years, Freud thought that that emotional learning was stuck in your brain forever. Now they know that when you stir it up, it becomes labile. And then when you show it a juxtaposition, a complete opposite, you literally can replace neural pathway. They just found that out in 2004. So you might be like, well, I'm sure they're teaching that in medical school now in psychology and all this. No, they're not teaching it. Because what's Western medicine like to do? They like to diagnose, label you, and then give you a drug. So if you're struggling with anything, it's not your fault. It's your brain just trying to do what it's supposed to do, and that's survive. That's it. And all you have to do is show it a different path and then your negative behavior goes away. And that might be cold calling. You might be afraid to call because if I am my authentic self, someone might judge me. And then if they judge me, that means I'm not enough and I might get kicked out of the tribe. And here we are. Now don't get that confused with you wake up every day and say, if I make a cold call, I'm going to die. That's your conscious brain. No, your subconscious brain that actually controls whether you pick up the phone is doing that. And you don't even know it. That was me for 47 years of my life.

So, okay. So your conscious brain is telling you, well, let's just use the cold calling example, because people are familiar with that. Your conscious brain is telling you what?

When you're about to call your conscious brain is telling you pick up the phone like like my mentors telling me to do because this is the way I'm going to make money. Okay? Your body is somatically telling you, why am I feeling this weight on my chest? Why am I sweating? It's because your body's saying, don't go there. That's more dangerous. If you get on the phone and you be your true self, someone might judge you just like my dad did. And when my dad judged me, I was afraid he might kick me out of the tribe. Again, your five-year-old self never said that. Your six-million-year-old brain that was through evolution for six million years. That's how we survived. We made sure we didn't get kicked out of the tribe. If you look at the human brain that was around for six million years, and I'm holding up my hands about two feet apart, do you realize that we have only not lived in tribes? And now I've moved my hand to like an inch apart. We all, I mean, it's a tiny fraction. So we are under that mentality that if we upset the tribe, we're going to get thrown out. And if we get thrown out, what does that mean? We die. So, so, so obvious your wife comes to you and she says, Hey, what you just did really bothered me. And you shut down. That literally is your brain saying, wait, You've got to shut down because if you speak up, she might withdraw her love. And if she withdraws her love, that reminds me of when I was a kid and my dad withdrew his love or my mom, and that could lead to getting kicked out of the tribe and ultimate death. So when you know that, when you can bring that to your conscious mind, then you can overwrite it.

So, okay, let me ask a couple of things here to clarify. Let's say, for example, you get on a call and your worst fear is, before you talk to them, all right, I'm gonna say the wrong thing, the seller's gonna think I'm an idiot, and I get totally embarrassed. In your mind, your old tribe, multimillion-year-old brain is saying, you're embarrassed in front of the society at large, you're gonna get kicked out, you're gonna die. What we're now needing to do, if I understand you correctly, practice behaviors in the new world where we don't live in tribes, where we have a new network and community. I think maybe that's what you're suggesting. And we can create new neural pathways that allow us to thrive in the current state of performance in our world today.

I mean, you said a really good job. I think just to go a little bit deeper. If someone called me and they were having a fear of cold calling, I don't know why they have a fear of cold calling. We would go back and identify that very thing. And then we would show the brain how it wasn't true because it's never true. It's always something that was made up in childhood in order for you to feel better and to survive. So that's what we would do. And then if it ever came up, your conscious brain would say, okay, I'm feeling this way because of my old self, but I know I'm safe. And I know there's nothing that I can say on this phone that's going to make me be, you know, demeaned, or it doesn't matter what the other person says, because use me for, well, for me, as an example, if I pick up the phone and I call someone, Five years ago, if they would have cussed me out and said, hey, you're a crook, I can't believe you're calling me, whatever, you're a scammer, I would have gotten really upset. Now, if they say that to me, I know that they're judging me because of something internal inside of them that came from them decades ago. So I'm just like, oh, they're really hurt, and I just let it go.

Yeah, it's their own issue, not yours. You're confident in your own self. I have to ask you, you mentioned $9 million and five mistakes. Can you dig into that a little bit?

Yeah, so 2 million was the lawsuit. I opened a Keller Williams team in 2008, and by 2010, we were the number one Keller Williams team in North America. My goal was to be the first agent team to sell a billion dollars in one year. Looking back, why? I didn't feel worthy. I didn't feel enough. And I thought if I could sell a billion dollars, the world might see me as worthy. They would love me and therefore they would keep me in the tribe. So there's another million. We figured we lost $3 million with three different contractors over three different years, renovating like 80 houses at a time, spread out like four to six hours in driving distance. Um, three development deals in the summer of 2005 on paper, the first five months we had netted a million and a half dollars. Remember we just started 2003. So even though my subconscious brain was telling me you're no good, my conscious brain was saying I'm smarter than everyone out here. So I don't know what's wrong with these people. I'm just going to retire early. So I'm gonna start doing development deals. Those three development deals cost us $3 million. So it was a confluence of events that all go back to my lack of self-worth and thinking that money and titles of the first agent team being a billion dollars would fix it. That's why a lot of entrepreneurs get into the business. If I can make $5 million or $10 million, then I'm gonna be happy and then I'm gonna be worthy. But that never happens because why does Matthew Perry die and Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson when they have all the money in the world? It doesn't matter how much money you have, if you don't feel enough, no amount of money is gonna make you happier. But here's the thing, when you do the work that we just talked about, the negative behavior being driven by the untruth that you don't even know about, when you do that work, you can get to the place that you think $10 million is going to get you to in 5 years, 10 years. You can get to that literally in 5 weeks in our program. Then when you're there, Avi, the chances of you making that $5 or $10 million go through the roof because you're not trying to do it to prove something. 3 years ago, when I shifted trying to make money to prove my worth to trying to make an impact, my net worth has grown more in these three years than any other three-year period, probably by multiple.

Wow. Okay. Because you're actually becoming who you really are, not who you're saying that society wants you to be, or you think you should be, right?

Ring the bell. Absolutely. Yeah. And I'm doing what I know God put me here to do, and that's help people end their suffering through subconscious limiting beliefs that they don't even know about. So if you're saying, huh, I wonder if I have some of these limiting beliefs, do yourself a favor, do your family a favor, do your business a favor, do your health a favor, and go to our website, unlocklimitlessyou.com forward slash quiz and take this three minute 12 question self-love quiz. And it's going to tell you based on the score, if you have some of these limiting beliefs. So if you're sitting there wondering why do all of my you know, marriages or relationships suck. Why am I 60 pounds overweight? Why do I drink so much when I come home? Why am I depressed? Why am I anxious? Why do I work so much? Why is my mind always racing? Why can't I sleep at night? Why do I wake up in the middle of the night? You'll learn from this quiz. And through awareness, that's how all change begins. You have to know about the problem in order to change it. I didn't know for 47 years that I lacked self-love and that I was in this invisible prison. I told the story to make myself feel better that I don't care what people think. I love myself. I have high self-esteem. But guess what? It was all a lie.

When did you realize that? At the Navy SEAL encounter?

Yeah, I realized that after I went from low self-esteem to high self-esteem and I could look back at my life and say, oh my gosh, that's why I smoked marijuana every night for a couple of years. That's why I drank in social situations. That's why I lost all that money. That's why I had two marriages that didn't work out. That's why I had two kids with anxiety problems. That, it just, on and on and on, I look back, because before, I just rationalized all that stuff. Well, who doesn't get divorced? And, you know, who doesn't smoke some weed? And who doesn't drink? Who doesn't have kids with anxiety problems? But yeah, it was just all me just trying to make sense of it or make an excuse for it, I guess.

Have you seen your, well, so it's been about four years since, well, three or four years since you've sort of unfolded a lot of this, right? Do you have two kids?

I have two kids, yeah. One turned 22 on Sunday, and my daughter turns 17 tomorrow.

We're going to go out here and celebrate. Have they seen the benefits of this as well? Have you seen any changes in their mindset?

They have changed drastically. We have the best relationship that we've ever had. I've given them all the tools. I talk to them nonstop about all the stuff that I've learned, and they're in the process of implementing it. Nobody's perfect. They're not perfect, but they've made huge strides. Actually, I got them someone to help them that does work similar to me, because it's obviously hard for dad to work in that. capacity. And in the last two months, there's been massive shifts in them. But even before that, like my daughter used to say a lot to me, dad, why do you always seem like, you know, upset or angry? And now she's like, dad, you smile all the time. Like we just have a fantastic relationship. We travel around the world. It's just, it's amazing. So yeah, if you, if you, if your kids have behavior problems and you want to know the source of them, grab your partner. walk them into the bathroom and look in the mirror, you're likely the source. Now, notice I didn't say it's your fault. It's not your fault, because if you lack self-love, you're gonna always go match with someone else that lacks self-love. And then guess what? You're gonna have kids that lack self-love. I believe that the greatest gift that you can ever give a child is to break this multi-generational curse that we're in, where we just keep passing it down. And you may ask, well, how do you do that? You teach your child how to love themselves unconditionally. My question to you is, if you don't love yourself unconditionally, how in the world can you teach your child to do that? So that would be another reason to take the self-love quiz. If your kids have struggles with grades, if they're acting up, if they have anxiety or depression, it likely is not 100%, but it likely has to do with the parents or the caregivers.

Very cool. And that makes a lot of sense.

Well, in my case, it was the responsibility of myself and their mother that caused their issues.

Yeah. Yeah. So if anybody wants to take the quiz, I want to make sure they got it right. UnlockLimitlessU.com forward slash quiz.

You got it, Y-O-U.

Okay. And what will people see there? Is it a multiple choice?

Yeah, multiple choice, 12 questions, 2 minutes and 45 seconds probably to take it. And you'll get an email with the scores. And then each day, there's 12 questions. I'll send you an email on each individual question telling you your score and how you can increase it.

Very cool. I, you know, I spent, uh, probably six or so years with the Gallup organization, same company that does the Gallup polls. And we, they had a lot of, um, you know, uh, behavioral economists and people that looked into the, everything behind the numbers in business. And we, we, one of the research papers we put out was all about emotional wellbeing. and the different factors involved in your wellbeing. And yeah, you may be a real estate investor that has high financial wellbeing, but emotionally you're toast. What's the most common thing you see as a problem with the real estate investors that you run into?

Racing mind, racing mind, trouble sleeping, never shut it off, always working, disconnected, not present. It's all from the same source. I've worked with people who could retire today, but they're working like 80 hours a week because they don't feel enough. They just need more, more, more, more, more.

Yeah, that resonates. I want to be respectful of the time. We can wrap up in just a few. Are you okay? Yeah. Yeah. I'm great. Yeah. Um, with regard to everyone's seeming seem to be focused on money, right. And people get into the business cause they want to make money and they want to, I mean, you hear similar stories of how people got into the business and a lot of it has to do with how much money you can make. Cause there's, there's great money in real estate. How do you then help people understand that it's not really about, I mean, look, you've been there, you've been to the top of the mountain with 4,500 deals. How do you look back and say, it's really not about how much money you make, it's about how happy you are and how, well, what would be your words to describe that, I guess?

So on your deathbed, I promise you, you're not going to be calculating how much money you made. I think, look, we all live for different reasons, right? But I think a majority of us are going to be asking ourselves, what impact did we make on the lives of the people around us or the world. The second is, what was our relationship like with the people in our world that meant the most to us? Those are the two things. If you're like, well, I don't believe that, let's go back to the example of all the famous people who have all this money. Again, Matthew Perry, Whitney Houston dying in a bathtub, Prince Michael Jackson overdosing. If you think it's about the money, why do you think they're not still with us? Money has nothing to do, this is an ironic and interesting thing. We just recently changed the name from Brad Chandler Coaching to Limitless You for obvious reasons. In 2017, I had a real estate coaching company called Brad Chandler, and the tagline was coaching you to freedom. Because at that time, I thought that you got freedom through money. You do not get freedom through money. Frankly, you don't get freedom from anything outside of yourself. The only way that you get true freedom is by loving yourself and connecting to yourself and being your authentic self. You were put here for a massive mission. If you can take off that mask, that was created to protect you from this thing that most of us are running from. And you can be your authentic self all the time without the use of drugs or alcohol or porn or shopping or whatever it is. Oh, my gosh. Like, that's true liberation. That's true liberation.

That's very cool to hear that. I mean, just in my small scope of things, I've got a clear understanding that it's not about what everyone on social media is saying. Well, oh, I do this many deals per month and I do this size deal and all that. It's about, are you happy with your pace and is it enough? And I'm not saying don't strive for more. I mean, obviously we all have a very specific drive that makes us successful in the first place. It's changing that focus to, you don't have to die with X dollars in the bank. It's not going to change, like you said, what you're thinking about on your deathbed. It's very powerful stuff.

Yeah. I was that guy that was talking about how much money I made, right? The people that are talking about that much money, unless they're trying to promote a program, a coaching program, it's just about insecurity. It's, look at me, I'm worthy. I bought a boat in 2021. It was a 42, it is a 42 foot boat. I still own it. It was the first boat ever bought in my life. And 60 days later, I decided I was going to sail it to the, that's not a sailboat. I was going to drive it, pilot it to the Bahamas. I left the night before I left, a buddy was teaching me how to read a chart. I had no business taking a boat to the Bahamas, but I wanted to, I wanted everyone to see me on my boat in the beautiful pictures because my subconscious mind said that will prove your worth. And so I went through the transformation. I made it to the Florida Keys and in that Airbnb bedroom, I was like, oh my gosh, this is why I bought that boat. This is why I was taken to the Bahamas. So I flew down, took it back up. And yeah, life has been different ever since.

That's so cool. Well, thank you for, for sharing this. Um, so you've got your podcast, which is called how to be happier as an entrepreneur or as how to be happier for entrepreneurs.

Yep. It's on all the major. Okay.

All right. So somebody searches that they'll find you as the host and, uh, I'll definitely be checking that out. And then the quiz they can take at unlock limitless, you.com slash quiz. Um, is there any other way that people can learn more about kind of how you think and how you help people?

Yeah, so I put out almost daily social media posts. So if you go to unlocklendlessu.com forward slash Brad, that has my link tree. It's a really cool platform that has, I mean, has everything on there. It even has my contact information, all my social media channels. So go there, take the quiz, listen to the podcast. If you like it, please rate it and review it. So I can share this message and help people stop suffering. But in conclusion, If you're suffering, if you're struggling, that's not the way life was meant to be. And I can't say this enough. It's not your fault. It's your brain just literally trying to do what it was supposed to do. And that's keep you alive. Because again, it thinks that this thing over here that you're running from is worse. So it's going to keep that negative behavior. So whatever situation you're in, I went to 30 years of therapy. I went to 50, 60 different marriage counseling sessions with probably five or different, 10 or different therapists. In three hours, I made more progress than all of that time put together. And that's what we see in three to five hours working with clients. We see this massive transformative shift. So I just want you to know that if you're struggling, it can change and it can change in a big way. Take the first step, whether you work with me or not, take the first step and at least take the quiz just so you can see where you're at. And then from there, you can come up with a game plan. And if you're really struggling and you need to pick up the phone and call someone or you know someone who's contemplating taking their life, please give them my phone number, which is in that link that I just gave you.

Yeah, well, I wasn't even planning to go into that, but that, that has been such a common theme now is seeing, I can't tell you how often I go onto Facebook and see someone passed away from God knows what reason, but yeah, I, uh, thank you for the work you're doing. Uh, is there anything else that you would say in terms of, I guess, parting words? I think most of the people that will listen to this are probably in the investing space, but just in general to entrepreneurs, what else would you say to, to wrap it up if anything else?

Yeah, I mean, we just we just introduced a new program, a 10 week program where we do the five week, the limitless life and relationship stuff or not relationships, just just the mindset stuff that I've talked about. And then I add on another five weeks of training. So it's personal coaching with me for five weeks. Definitely not for a newbie, but someone who is, you know, got a company and wants to take it to the next level. That's an option. And again, I think, you know, I can't get the message across enough that life is meant to be full of abundance, full of joy, full of deeply connected relationships. And if you don't have those, They are out there and you can obtain those things, but you've got to start with the inner work. I spent 47 years trying to chase happiness and joy and worth by looking outside, boats, cars, women, status, money, whatever it was, trips. And I learned that everything I ever needed to be happy, I had inside myself. You're the same way. You've got everything you need to be happy. You just need to change the way that your mind perceives information. That's it. It's really that simple.

Amazing. Well, thank you so much for sharing your insights. And I know that anyone who listens to this and pays attention to it will get tremendous value. So thank you, Brad, for doing that. Thank you for having me. Of course. Of course. We'll talk to you soon.

Thanks so much for tuning into this episode of The Deal Pen. We sure do appreciate it. If you haven't done so already, make sure you're subscribed to the show wherever you consume podcasts. This way we'll get updates as new episodes become available. If you feel so inclined, please leave us a review. And remember, there's always more deals to be had in The Deal Pen. Until next time, friends.